No word from her yet. Am I still raising her two children? You know it. The real fear of it all is that I don't want her to come back. It just makes life harder for her children. Her older son, we'll call him James, wants absolutely nothing to do with her. Which is sad, in some respects. I understand where he's coming from though. There have been times in my life that I didn't want anything to do my mother either. My mother has made her mistakes.
Her younger son, we'll call him Sean, he misses the crap out of her. Sometimes it makes me angry. I know there is a bond between mother and child that can not be broken by crack pipes, prostitution or abandonment. I suppose I had just hoped he would see past it all. Yet, on some level I hope that he never does. On the day he sees past her for who she really is that beautiful twinkle in his deeply set brown eyes will be lost forever. At what point is our innocence so crudely stripped away from us? I wish I could find it. If you should happen upon my innocence please tell it that I am waiting for it here. I'll stay put. I won't move for fear that it may return.
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